Make a difference! Make a donation to Marianne!
(All
Pay Pal proceeds go to the fund for Marianne and her family)
2/2/04
Sadly, Marianne’s fight for her life came to an end in the
early morning hours of February 1st 2004, a year and a day after her
initial diagnoses. In spite of this,
the family has urged us to continue going forward with the last fundraiser as
planned. Lee and Sydney, along with the McLelland’s and Fuller’s need our love
and support now more than ever. The family still has many bills to pay, as this
difficult year has been a strain both emotionally as well as financially.
Please make plans to attend the fundraiser event. It will be a positive and uplifting tribute to
Marianne’s life!
_____________________________________________________________________________
2/1/04
Our
beloved Marianne went to Heaven this morning. She went peacefully in her sleep
and we are comforted knowing that she will not have to suffer anymore.
We
will be coming home tomorrow and will make the arrangements for her
service. I am guessing that it will be
Wednesday or Thursday and I will let you know as soon as I have the details.
I
know that many of you will want to send food, etc., to Lee and Sydney and we
are asking that you do so through me for right now. We feel it would be
difficult for Sydney to have a lot of visitors at this time. I will be home late tomorrow so please feel
free to call me at home on Tuesday at 770-599-9457 or on my cell at
770-845-4743 and we can make arrangements. I only live a few miles from their
house and can take it to them right away.
Thank you for respecting our wishes.
Please
know that Marianne and our family have been so blessed and comforted with your
prayers and outpouring of love this past year.
She knew every day that all of you were here for her and for us and it
has helped us more than words can ever say.
God
Bless you all and I send our love to you!
The
Hudsons, McLellands, and Fullers
__________________________________________________________________________________________
1/28/04
I
think I have figured out a way to send email to everyone from Texas. I have
divided up my group and will send it out four times. I hope this works. Please
let me know if I lost anyone.
Marianne
was able to see Sydney again today. She
is working hard at her physical therapy and has a fighting attitude! She continues to amaze and inspire me. I
can't even begin to describe it to you.
I
know that God is listening to our prayers and will continue to give all us of
strength and courage. So many have
written about their children praying and friends that don't even know us. He is reaching all of us through Marianne
and will be here for us no matter what lies ahead.
Marianne
sends her love and feels the blessing of your love and friendship. She is a blessing to us as well!
Laura
______________________________________________________________________________________
1/26/04
This is from Kent. He is back
home by the way, but he isn’t sure how to use Laura’s list so I am forwarding
these on his behalf. When Laura gets back in town and is settled she will be
taking over these updates again J Lisa
Hello
everyone this Kent. i just got back from texas and am trying to catch up
on life on the homefront. Marianne seemed a little better before I left
today. She is very much alert and
responds well to any questions she is asked.the last week there has been a
rollercoaster emotionally. I am sure you all can imagine. News changes quickly
as do options and suggestions. The staff at the hospital deserves alot of
credit. They treat Marianne as though she was their daughter or little sister.
Their emotions and feelings are just like ours. Love and care is everywhere you
go out there.
I have seen alot in the last week. Tears, laughter, sorrow, joy and
inspiration just to name a few. Marianne is by far the strongest person I have
ever known. I feel so helpless and weak. But her strength and determination
keep me going. Friday seemed as though it was the end. Marianne had a
seizure and fell. I was there. It was horrible too say the least. By all means
it should have been the end.the staff worked quickly and stabilized her and
stopped her bleeding. If not for the platelets that had been donated earlier by
Robert Laura and myself, it would have been the end. Many of you have asked what
can you do? Donate platelets. You may be able to save someone elses Marianne by
donating, it only reqires a little of your time. Our friends and family support
has been incredible.all of you keep us going and you keep Marianne going.
I thank god for all of you. The game is not over. Keep the faith I love you
all
Kent
__________________________________________________________________________________________
1/26/04
From Laura:
Just
wanted to let you know how things are going.
Marianne is having a pretty good day today. She was able to do some physical therapy and has eaten a little
soup and jello. Big improvement!
I
also wanted to express that we are continuing to pray as you are, that we have
not given up on this fight and neither has Marianne. We know that it is in God's hands and that we are standing on our
faith and praying for a miracle for her.
Marianne is fighting and doing everything she can and we are rallying
around her to give her strength. Your
prayers and strength are helping to support us. Thank you and God bless you each and every one!
Laura
_________________________________________________________________________________________
1/25/04
Here
is some news to warm your broken hearts.
Marianne was able to visit with her daughter, Sydney, yesterday. They enjoyed seeing each other and Sydney
was such a 'big girl' in the room with her. She was too busy checking things
out to be afraid of all the equipment, etc.
I am able to check my email so you
can respond to my address if you want to. Everything else is pretty much the
same. We continue to draw from your
strength and love. Thank you.
Laura
__________________________________________________________________________________________
1/23/04
It
is tremendously difficult for me to find the words to say what I need to
say
to you.
Marianne
has suffered many complications over the past few days. The doctors
and
our family know now that her life with us on Earth is coming to an end.
We
do not know at this time how long she has but please know that we are
here
with her and are sharing your love with each other and especially with
Marianne
and Lee.
She
seems to be comfortable and peaceful without pain right now. She is in
the
care of the most incredible team of nurses and staff to ensure that she
remains
that way. She has slept most of the day
but is aware that we are
here
with her. Lee's parents are on the way
here with Sydney.
I
know that many of you would like to come out here to see her and to be
with
us. However, it is best for all of us to keep things as they are.
Marianne
is not able to see anyone and we are drawing on your prayers and
strength
from home. Please know that we feel it,
that it is sustaining us
and
that it brings her an incredible sense of peace.
Marianne
was able to see the CD from the fundraiser and read the song list,
etc. It made her very happy and we hope to be
able to play the music for
her
if she is up to it.
Even
though I feel email can be so impersonal, I want to keep on updating
you
and this is the only way to reach the hundreds (maybe thousands) of
people
praying for us. You have each been such
a rock for me and my family
and
I know that you are always here for us. God bless you all!
I
have wondered many times what do I pray for now? I feel the answer is to
pray
for peace for Marianne, pray that she is able to see Sydney again, pray
for
her suffering to be minimal, and pray for each other to continue to be
strong.
Marianne
sends her love to each of you!
Love,
The
McLellands, Hudsons, and Fullers
_______________________________________________________________________________________
1/22/04
From Laura:
We
are still waiting for many test results.
Marianne seems better today because she got some sleep last night, she
has eaten, she is complaining less about pain, has become more verbal and clear
headed, and wants to get out of the bed!
That isn't really possible right now, but maybe she can take a ride in
the wheelchair for a few minutes tomorrow.
They
detected some blood in her spinal fluid but cannot pinpoint the source. It could be any of the possibilities
(leukemia, lymphoma, or infection) or could be from trauma at the sight where
the sample was drawn. No one can tell
for sure at this time. She has a pretty high fever and her blood pressure can
get high at times. We are hoping for
infection because that is much more treatable with a greater chance of
success.
Unfortunately,
it will most likely be Monday or Tuesday before the molecular test results will
be back. Those results should tell us
for sure if the cancer cells are back.
Until then, we will continue to be here for her and for each other. Her doctor used the term roller coaster ride
and it seems fitting at this point. He
encouraged us to pray for her.
She
will be receiving platelets daily for a while and my husband and Kent have
donated so far. I am going to try to
meet the requirements again and donate this weekend. We do not need you to go
out and do it at this time, but I will let you know if/when the time comes.
When
I asked Marianne if she would like to add anything to my email , she said to
tell you "I am sorry I can't respond to your emails, thank you for them
and for your prayers, and I love you".
We
know that hundreds of you would jump on a plane if we gave the 'go ahead'. It is so difficult to encourage you not to
at this point and we greatly appreciate your understanding of our
circumstances. You have been such a
source of support for us. Thank you!
The
Hudson’s, McLelland’s, and Fuller’s
____________________________________________________________________________________________
1/21/04
Hi
folks,
Me
again. I just
spoke to Kent.
I will try to sum up what he told me as best I can. I took notes
while we talked but I am sure I won’t get it all in here.
Basically there is a blockage in her spinal fluid. They are doing
tests and it will take a few days for the results to get back but it could be 1
of 3 possible things:
1.
Bacterial.
If this is the case then it is the miracle they have been hoping for because it
can be treated
2.
A
form of cancer known as post-transplant lymphoma
3.
The
ALL is back
Let’s all
hope it is bacterial which can be treated. If it is either of the other 2 then
we are looking at slim chances here.
Marianne is
conscious but she is highly medicated. One minute she is lucid and can talk and
is aware, next minute she is talking out of her head and not making sense,
hallucinating, etc. Those are side effects of the strong medication she is on.
Kent said
the shingles are getting better and the Graft vs. Host disease is also getting
better, in that they aren’t as bad as they were. That is good new as I know the
shingles are a great source of pain for her. He also said she is still in a
good bit of pain. She doesn’t really want anyone around and won’t really talk
with anyone. He said she is the sickest he has ever seen anyone and that her
spirits are very low and she is very tired.
She has a
fever, which could be due to the fact that they took her off the steroids and
it is a reaction to that, but they just don’t know. That is the worst, not
knowing anything right now. Knowing they have to wait a few days to get the
tests back to find out either way and to be on edge like that for that long
with the unknown.
The doctors
are baffled because she is showing the most rare of rare complications with
this form of leukemia. Kent said she is in the 1 percentile and the best
doctor’s in the world are working on this and they can’t put their finger on
it.
Another big
concern is that she is losing the will to fight the disease. From what I
understand the mental and physical fighting of illness is an important part of
the healing process and she is so tired and so wracked with pain that she is
starting to give up. I hate to hear that and we all hope that in a few days the
doctors will walk in and say, “Guess what? We can treat it!” and she can start
fighting again.
I have
talked with a few folks who want to fly out and be with her and her family. I
asked Kent about that and he said it really wouldn’t be a good time right now.
He said Marianne wants everyone to remember her healthy and that she doesn’t
really want anyone around at the moment. The entire McLelland nuclear family is
there and I get the impression that while they are counting on everyone’s love
and support and appreciate every bit of it to the fullest, they, and Marianne
need some private time right now.
I don’t
about you all but Merritt and I have said lately that we can’t concentrate on
our work for thinking about Marianne and the McLelland family. The McLelland’s
are very special to Merritt and I and I know to all of you too.
Lately it
seems busy work and the everyday meaningless things that creep in to our lives
all seem so ridiculous in the grand scheme of things.
Like
someone said today, Marianne is too sweet of a person to have all of this
happening to her.
Just
remember to appreciate each moment and each person. Don’t waste it.
I, or
someone will send more news as we get it.
Take Care!
Lisa and
Merritt
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
1/21/04
Laura asked that I send out this update on her behalf:
I don't really know what to say this morning. Marianne had a really rough night, rough
past few days. She has a fever and is very
uncomfortable and in pain. We are
waiting for test results to come back.
She has some type of infection and it seems that she may have cancer
cells again in her spinal fluid. It
will take a few more days for the cells to develop from the sample they took to
confirm or eliminate the possibility. I
am not a scientist so I may get some of this wrong. Basically, there are a lot of things going on in her body and
they are working hard to determine exactly what it is.
I
have been honest with you all along. It
doesn't look good. We haven't been given much hope or possibiliites for
improvement so far. Our whole family is
here with Marianne and we are using your love and strength to help support
us. I know that the fundraiser was a
huge success and that it has meant so much to us to see the goodness that has
come out of this experience. Marianne
is touching so many lives and making such a difference.
I
don't even know what to ask you to pray for.
Strength for Marianne, for us, and for each of you; and a miracle!
God
bless you and your families and thank you for being here for us!
Laura
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
1/19/2004
Laura cannot access her full address book from the computer she
is using in Texas and asked that I send this out to you
Lisa
Mom and I are awaiting the arrival of the rest of the family from
the airport. Marianne is comfortable
right now and has been resting peacefully for several hours. I guess we will regroup in the morning and
speak with her doctor about the next step.
Please know that we feel your love and support and are leaning on you
for strength tonight. Thank you for
making the fundraiser such an incredible event. Thank you for your prayers!
I will update you as soon as I know something else.
Love,
Laura
Mom is here with me and sends her love to each of you!
___________________________________________________________________________________________
1/19/2004
Heavy news folks. As some of you
who were at the fundraiser last night know Laura is in Texas because of
complications Marianne has been experiencing. She left yesterday. Kent just
called us here at home. He, and everyone else in the family who are still here
in GA are on their way home to pack and go to Texas today. The doctor called
and wants everyone out in Texas ASAP. They did a spinal tap on Marianne
yesterday and found something in her blood that wasn’t good. At the time they
weren’t sure if it was yet another infection or a re-appearance of the
leukemia. They now know it is the leukemia, but a different form. I am not sure
exactly what it is called and Kent wasn’t sure either. The doctor doesn’t want
to give up but knows she is weak. He said there is an outside chance they can
treat it. The family has been called out to make a decision as to what to do.
Whether to bring her home or try to treat it. Right now Marianne is not
conscious. I will keep everyone updated as I get more news and info. Kent said
he would try to call later and let us know more. He asked that I call and
e-mail everyone who I think needs to know and to keep praying and sending good thoughts to her and the family. As always,
I will keep the web site updated as more news comes in.
Thanks,
Lisa and Merritt
____________________________________________________________________________________________
1/9/2004
Marianne's status is still the same. They are
slowly decreasing the steroids and will be watching for signs of infection.
Thank you for all of the emails! Lee is reading them to her and it is a
huge source of encouragement for her! Bless you all!
I hope to see many of you at the fundraiser next
weekend. I think they could still use some help and sponsors and auction items.
You can buy tickets ahead of time if you want. The website is Fundraiser for Marianne
McLelland Hudson. Thank you for your prayers and keep passing it on!
_________________________________________________________________________________________
1/7/2004
Marianne will most likely be in the hospital for a
while. The main problems are Shingles and Graft Vs. Host. The treatments
for each cause problems with the other. They tried a new medication yesterday
and it will take a few doses to see any results. The medication is given once a
week. She will also begin another treatment called photpheresis the end
of this week. If I understand correctly, they will remove her blood and radiate
it to suppress the Graft vs. Host. The possible side effects of these new
treatments are infection and bone marrow suppression, and suppression to her
immunne system, which is already very weak. She is in a great deal of
pain and discomfort and is struggling with her spirit and courage to continue
fighting. She is weak and sad and scared! I am not sure what the
prognosis is at this point.
I am asking each of you to email her at the hospital. She is not checking her
email or taking any phone calls at this time. I don't even know if she will be
able to read the emails, but someone can read them to her or she can just look
at the stack of paper and know that so many people are here to give her
strength and support when she is feeling like she can't bare it anymore. So
please take a minute over the next few days and reach out to her. She
needs us so much right now! The website is M. D. Anderson
Cancer Center and her patient number is 543618.
I came home last night a Kent and Lee and Mom are with Marianne in Texas. My
dad is going this weekend. I will let you know what I know. Thank you so
much1
Love,
Laura
___________________________________________________________________________________________
1/5/2004
Posted on behalf of
Cindy (Gillespie) Ivey
I've
been asked by several people this morning for an update so here it is:
Douglas
talked to Kent just a little while ago and he was on his way back to the
hospital. They were able to make Marianne a "little" more comfortable
last night with several types of pain medication. Today, after Lee signed some
consent forms, they are going to try some "experimental" drugs on
her. First, they are going to have to do a bone marrow biopsy. It is my
understanding that her immediate family, except her Dad (he has the flu), is at
the hospital.
Douglas is
talking to Kent and then I am talking to Douglas so we will keep you posted. If
you do NOT wish to receive these updates, PLEASE let me know. I'm new at this and
don't want to get on anyone's nerves!!
Take care,
Cindy
_______________________________________________________________________________________
1/3/2004
Marianne
was admitted back into the hospital on Wednesday evening. She has
had
a fever and severe pain. They
determined that the Graft vs. Host disease
was
getting worse and wanted to treat her for infection quickly and put her on
a
strong dose of steroids to treat the Graft vs. Host. She still has the
shingles
as well.
She
is in a lot of pain and is very sad to be back in the hospital. Lee and
I
came out to Houston on Friday and will stay for a few days. She seems to be
stabilizing
on the new meds and her fever has broken today. Please continue
to
pray for her and her speedy recovery from these complications. I will let
you
know as soon as I learn more.
Laura
________________________________________________________________________________________
12/30/2003
Marianne sounded much better today! It was the
first time in a long time that she wasn't crying from the pain when I
called. She has been through so much! I am planning on going to
Houston for the weekend and I can't wait! I am going to really have to
restrain myself from smothering her with a big hug! I think that when the
day comes that she is able to receive one, I will never let her go!
She hasn't felt like checking her emails lately but
I am keeping her updated on your continued prayers and support. I am
hoping that I can read some of them to her while I am out there and maybe clear
out her in box. I am sure it is loaded with messages!
As always, I will take your love and well wishes
with me and share them with her and my mom. Also, for those of you who
are asking, they are using Eckerd’s for prescriptions and medical supplies if
you are interested in sending gift cards. The address is:
7500 Brompton
Apt. 559
Houston, TX 77025
Also, they send thanks for all of the phone cards
and other gift cards! Mom uses them as soon as they arrive!
I know that the new year is going to bring my
sister home safe and sound. I wish that all of you have a Happy New Year
as well!
Love,
Laura
___________________________________________________________________________________________
12/24/2003
Marianne continues to be strong despite her pain
and suffering. She was given a good report by her doctor this past weekend.
There is still no sign of Leukemia cells or the Philadelphia Chromosome and her
counts are improving! She still has the Graft vs. Host but a little is
good, although I am sure she would argue that point. He said he would
work towards the goal of getting her back home around the end of January! She
would then continue her treatment at Emory. Please pray for that dream to come
true!
Lee and Sydney are with her and Mom this week for
Christmas. We will plan to go as soon as the Fuller family germs are
gone. I miss them so much! Marianne was very sad last night and in
a great deal of pain. She said that they took a biopsy of the "sores"
on her back to see exactly what it is, it may not be related to shingles or
Graft vs. Host. I didn't get too much info from her because she wasn't able to
talk due to the pain. It breaks my heart to hear her cry. I want to hold her
and hug her but couldn't do that even if I was with her. I had a disturbing
dream last night that she was able to come home but she wouldn't let anyone
touch her. She was so used to the pain that even though it was gone, she
couldn't bear to be held or touched anymore for fear that it would hurt. I was
crying when I woke up this morning. It has been so long since I have had
my arms around her, so long since anyone has.
I told her last night how strong she is and she
said that she felt like she was losing it. I reminded her that she is
fighting with those tears and cries of pain. I told her that when she
feels like she is losing it, remember that we are all here to hold her up, that
we are not going to let her fall. That we have created the warmest,
safest embrace for her to lean back on. And I meant every word of it. I
know that you are all here to help her and someday she will come home and be
able to feel this huge embrace that we have for her.
I don't know how people who are sick can survive
alone. I can't imagine this past year without all of you here with us.
Even though it is communicated through cyberspace and mail for the most part,
it is felt in our hearts and minds and spirits. I hope that you all have
a wonderful Christmas and are able to celebrate and rejoice with your families.
I will be with mine in spirit and heart and will thank God for you and the love
you have shared with us. God bless you and Merry Christmas!
Love,
Laura
___________________________________________________________________________________________
12/18/03
Marianne is improving slowly but surely. She is
still fighting the shingles and is suffering from some pretty serious pain. She
is working hard to build up her strength and muscles and is determined to come
home soon! She still has the Graft vs. Host disease and is being treated
for that as well. She is having the plasma exchange periodically to help out
with platelets.
The entire Fuller family has been out of
work/school this whole week with the flu. It has been horrible. Of
course, we had to cancel our plans to go to Texas for the weekend and have been
very upset about it. My dad is still going to try to fly out there sometime
this weekend, although the flights are overbooked again. I think some of Kent's
children have been getting sick as well. It is going to be a bittersweet
Christmas for all of us. We are so thankful and blessed to have Marianne in
Texas and to be at the post-transplant stage, but we are so sad that we cannot
be together during the holidays. I know that what is important is that she
is fighting and surviving but I am still selfish enough to be angry about the
circumstances. I miss my family and want them to come home. I want
Marianne to stop hurting.
Mom and Marianne could probably use some extra HO
HO HO's since we can't bring the grandchildren out there. Lee and Sydney should
be able to go out next week for Christmas so I know they will enjoy their time
together.
I'll update again soon! Take care and beware
of the flu-it is really ugly!
Laura
__________________________________________________________________________________________
12/14/03
Marianne continues to do well as an
outpatient! She is having a difficult time with the shingles and is in a
lot of pain. She is very weak and is now going to physical therapy to
help her rebuild her muscles. She has fallen a few times and scared Mom to
death! I know it is frustrating to her to be out of the hospital and
still feel so crappy. She goes to the clinic daily and they assess her
needs. She may get blood or platelets, potassium, whatever she needs. Lee
is out there with her this weekend and we are planning to leave Thursday and
Friday for our Christmas weekend together. My daughter has caught the flu over
the weekend and I don't know if we(she) will be able to go. She is very excited
to go to Texas and will be quite disappointed. We are all looking forward
to being together.
I hope you have had the opportunity to view the
fundraiser website I sent. They are really working to make them very
special events. Make sure you go to the guestbook and leave a message for
Marianne. I know she is going to enjoy reading them! Fundraiser for Marianne
McLelland Hudson
Here we are, almost one year later, and you
continue to amaze me. No one has forgotten us, no one has walked away, in
fact, the love and support continues to grow exponentially! You can't
imagine how much it means to us to have this energy surrounding us. I
know I can speak for my entire family when I say that we feel this embrace
around us and we have security knowing that no one is dropping their arms and
leaving. As I have said before, Marianne has a lot of old friends to see
again, and even more new friends to meet.
Laura
__________________________________________________________________________________________
12/08/2003
Marianne was released from the hospital today! We are all very excited and very nervous but we know that things are going to be better because she is stronger this time and even more ready to go home. She will stay at the apartment in Houston at night and go to the hospital clinic for outpatient monitoring and treatment. I do not know at this time what her schedule will be this week.
Mom got to come home for a few days and then
arrived back in Houston to bring her 'home'. My father has been there
since Sunday and some family friends visited with her over the weekend.
She has been up moving around and improving her strength in preparation for her
release.
We are looking forward to going out there for
Christmas and hope to bring her home soon! Thanks again for your love and
prayers!
Laura
__________________________________________________________________________________________
12/02/2003
I got in from Texas late last
night. I was stranded because of the holiday. Marianne was able to
visit with Lee and Sydney all week and she seems to be doing okay. She received
the results from the last bone marrow extraction/evaluation last night and the
results indicated that all of her cells are now from the donor! That
means that the transplant has worked and hopefully all of the bad stuff is
gone! (please excuse my less than technical explanation, I usually just try to
get the bottom line because the rest is too confusing!) She is still
struggling with the Shingles and is in a lot of pain but they may release her
sometime next week to try outpatient treatment. We are all very excited and
very nervous at the same time!
Marianne's birthday is tomorrow! I will send her email and address again
for anyone who wants to wish her a happy birthday. She may not check her email
so you might have a better chance at emailing her through the hospital website
because they will print it and take it up to her. Remember, she can't
have any fruit baskets, cookies, other food or fresh flowers!
Email- lmhk9@aol.com
Address:
7500 Brompton Apt. 559
Houston, TX 77025
Click here: M. D. Anderson Cancer Center
Marianne’s patient number: 543618
Thanks for everything!
Laura
_________________________________________________________________________________________
11/23/03
Marianne
has learned over the weekend that she has developed Shingles. It is a
very, very painful viral "infection" that is in the same family as
cold sores, Herpes, and the chicken pox. She has lesions or blisters on
her torso, arms, and shoulders and is in terrible pain and discomfort.
She is taking extra pain relievers and is pretty much confined to the bed
again. From what I understand, it causes no risk to the transplant but it
is setting her back a few days, or possibly longer. She is not able to get up
and move around and develop her muscles again like she was doing the past few
days. She will need to recover from this and then start back with walking
around and regaining her strength.
Her doctor
has said that she is not contagious and that Lee and Sydney can still come for
Thanksgiving. I am most likely going to go next weekend for a few days.
My mother is very tired and emotionally drained and may even come home
for a few days. She has been incredible out there!
Two new
fundraisers are in the works and are going to be incredible! Some of our
wonderful Fayette County High friends are putting together some amazing events
and I will pass on the info as soon as I get the okay. I know a lot of you will
not only want to attend but also participate so I will make sure you get
connected with the right people. What a blessing you all continue to be
to us!
If you ever
ask "why Marianne", reflect back on this year and my emails and all
of the wonderful things that have come from this experience. It becomes
crystal clear.
Our love to
each of you and yours,
Laura
______________________________________________________________________________________________
11/21/03
Marianne is doing much much better! Her white blood cell count is
rising and she is finally hanging on to some of her platelets! She has been
walking around the floor at the hospital and the best news of all: she
got up by herself and went down to the gift shop and went shopping!!!!!!!!
She enjoyed it so much that she went back again later the same day. She
said she told mom that she had to get out of that room!
We are planning our family trip to Texas for Christmas and we are all so
excited to get to spend some time together. My children have really
missed Aunt Marianne and Grandma Jim (or Gim, as my two year old son Evan calls
her)! Lee and Sydney plan to spend a few days with them for Thanksgiving
and my father is going for the day.
There are a few new fundraisers in the works and I will pass on that info as
soon as I can. You have all been so amazing, words can never describe
what you have meant to us. You are all like guardian angels watching out for us
as we continue this journey to bring Marianne back home, healthy and ready to
go on with her life. What a celebration we will have! Marianne has
no idea how many friends she has that she has yet to meet.
I'll try to update again in a few days. Thank you so much!
Love,
Laura
________________________________________________________________________________________________________
11/12/03
Marianne is
getting better! She has been up moving around the floor and is making
progress with the medication changes. She is still suffering and battling the
Graft vs. Host disease but so far it is contained to her skin and no signs of
it moving to her internal organs. Hooray! She did not get to leave
the hospital or visit with Sydney since my last email but the doctor said that
next week he would evaluate future plans for possible discharge from the
hospital. My dad was able to fly out today to visit with her and he was
encouraged with her progress. Her husband, Lee, has been sick and has not been
able to go out there again.
I can't
thank you enough for your emails. I wish I could respond to each of them but
today I had 147! Please know that I read them all and at I at least
respond in my head. I think Marianne is getting online some days. Her
email address is lmhk9@aol.com for those of
you who have just joined us. I was able to get clearance from AOL to continue
sending out these emails. They told me the last one went to 1023 people after
everyone forwarded it on. Can you believe that? I am astounded!
We are
making arrangements to all fly out to Texas for Christmas. Please pray
that we can all be together, to be able to get flights and time off from work
to be together as a family. It would mean so much to all of us.
You are all
making such a difference in our lives!
Laura
_________________________________________________________________________________________
11/05/03
I have a
great update on Marianne and pictures and lots of emotions to get out
today! So for those of you who have shared that I make you cry, you are
duly warned!
Marianne is
doing MUCH better than a few days ago. She has been able to get out of
the bed and has even made a few laps around the hall! Huge
improvement! She even sounds more like herself and has been getting
online to check emails again. She feels so isolated from everyone and
being able to reach out and talk to you is some of the best medicine she can
ever receive. She may even get to leave the hospital for a few hours and
visit with Lee and Sydney at the apartment this weekend.
Her
strength is amazing. She has been through so much that we can even begin to
imagine. Seeing her suffer is unbearable. I sat with her last weekend and
she hardly spoke to me. She was so uncomfortable and in pain and
suffering with the rash that covers her body. She is literally bruised from
head to toe. Her body is full of fluid and steroids and she doesn't even look
like herself anymore. (She most likely will not appreciate me sharing this,
TMI, I know, sorry Marianne) But I need to get it out. I wish I could
quit my job and hire a nanny and never leave her side until we bring her
home. It is so difficult to say goodbye. I feel guilty that she
thinks we are all going on with our lives and living without her while she is
there. I don't know how to express to her that she occupies every breath I
take. Even making simple decisions are difficult because it all seems so
trivial.
I read an
email my brother sent to her recently. He told her that he wished he
could be like the big guy from the movie The Green Mile and that he could suck
all of this out of her and take it into him. I couldn't even finish reading
it. We are so fortunate and blessed to have each other. My family
will never be the same, in so many positive ways. I stared at Marianne
while she was trying to sleep and tried to define our relationship. I
realized that of all the people in the world, I feel the closest to Marianne,
for many different reasons. Now don't get me wrong, we have our
differences and arguments. But we can finish each others sentences and know how
the other will respond to our thoughts. We shared a room until I was in
the fifth grade and then spent the majority of our time hanging out together
with the same friends and activities. Even though I sometimes talk to her
three or four times a day, it is not the same. There have been so many
times I have picked up the phone to gossip or share something unimportant, like
that I saw legwarmers in the stores, and I stopped myself because she is not
able to be interested.
I want my
sister to come home and enjoy her life again like she should. I want her to be
here for holidays and nothing days. I felt guilty for being able to take
Sydney out for Halloween. She has suffered enough for ten long months and
I am angry about it! I try not to be but I can't help it. I want to take
it away, like Kent; I want to take it over for now on, just let me take it from
here! And I am angry because I can't. I am working on the anger,
but am not sure where to put it. ( for all of the new people or people
who don't know me, this is my outlet and my psychiatric couch). Although
my intentions are to serve as a link to Marianne, I often have to let some of it
go. You have all been so supportive and gracious in allowing me to do so.
Thank you for being there for me.
Again, I
thank you on behalf of my sister and our families for being a constant source
of support and prayer. I have needed you almost as much as she does.
Laura
___________________________________________________________________________________________
10/28/03
I don't even know how or where to begin. Marianne is not doing
very well. I'll try to get the info and times right but don't hold me to
it.
Marianne was admitted back into the hospital October 18. We went to
Alabama for our grandmother's funeral on Sunday and then my father and I flew
out the next Monday to visit for the day. I decided to spend the night
and my dad came back home. Things went down hill from there. Throughout the
rest of the week, my family members all flew to Texas, including Marianne and
Lee's daughter, Sydney.
Marianne has developed a disorder/disease called Thrombocytopenic Purpura
(TPP). I may have gotten that right. Anyway, the way I understand
it is that her platelets are getting the wrong message and are clotting
throughout her blood vessels. Her cells are becoming damaged as they pass
through the clots and she is passing them. She has been undergoing a
procedure called a Plasma Exchange daily. Her blood is removed and her plasma
is separated and then her blood is returned with new plasma that has been
donated. She is also receiving platelets regularly and everyone in the family
that was able, donated for her.
She is currently in the ICU and is having several complications including very
high blood pressure, low platelets, sometimes a slight fever, swelling, and on
and on. She had a seizure early on Wednesday morning and they were able
to detect some brain swelling. As of today, they think that the swelling is
gone. She has drug-induced diabetes and her insulin and glucose levels
fluctuate. They have had to stop the medication for the Graft vs. Host
disease because it may have caused an allergic reaction.
We don't know when she will leave ICU. We all came home Sunday evening,
except for Mom and Lee. Marianne got to see Sydney three brief times
because we were able to get special permission from her doctor. Three of
Marianne's friends also came out on Saturday and were able to visit with
her. Having all of us together really lifted her spirits, especially
spending time with her daughter!
I am sure I left out a lot and got some of it wrong. All I know is that she is
not doing very well, and the main concern is her kidneys failing. The
transplant seems to be doing fine, it is all this other stuff that is the
problem. I will keep you updated as I learn new things. I am
planning to go back this weekend after Halloween. I promised Marianne I would
make sure Sydney gets to trick or treat in my neighborhood with my son
Evan. Then I am out of here.
Please continue to pray for her, as I know you are. I am so scared and
hate being away from her. She needs all of us so much right now. I think
you can go to the MD Anderson Website and somehow send her an email. I haven't
had time to check it out. When I get home tonight, I will try to send out a
link.
Thanks for reaching out to us!
Laura